


Your Shadow

by kyjr



Category: Johnny's Entertainment, KAT-TUN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-16
Updated: 2013-10-16
Packaged: 2017-12-29 14:02:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1006285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyjr/pseuds/kyjr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yamapi and Kame have never been really close, but filming for the same drama might just change that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your Shadow

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [](http://yukitsubute.livejournal.com/profile)[**yukitsubute**](http://yukitsubute.livejournal.com/) for the [](http://help-pilipinas.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://help-pilipinas.livejournal.com/)**help_pilipinas** fundraiser.

To Yamapi, Kame was kind of just that awkward kid who hung onto Jin's every word and trailed him everywhere. Whenever Yamapi thought about Kame, Jin was always there. He didn't really remember a time where he'd seen one without the other, to be completely honest.

When he received news that he was to act alongside Kame in a drama, he wasn't sure what to think.

"It's just Kame," Jin said, his voice fuzzy from the other end of the phone. "He's as harmless as a fly."

"I swear I've been bitten by one of those," Ryo murmured.

"By Kame, or a fly?" Jin asked, and Yamapi laughed into the phone.

"Pi!" Ryo suddenly screeched, and both Yamapi and Jin yelped.

"What?"

"What's really on your mind?" Ryo asked. "You only do the whole three-way-conversation thing when something's really wrong and need a bunch of advice at once."

"Yeah, hurry up so I don't feel like a total girl," Jin added.

Yamapi sighed, shifting so he was lying on the floor with his legs up on his bed. "I know, I know..."

"This can't be all about Kame, right?"

Yamapi was silent, picking at a random spot on the carpet.

"Pi, seriously?" Jin sighed. "He's just a kid--"

"And an adorable one at that," Ryo added.

"I know, but--"

"Jin, off the phone," Ryo suddenly snapped.

"Eh? What? Why me?" Jin whined. Yamapi laughed a little, looking up at the ceiling and wondering when the hell that mark got up there.

"Because I said so." Yamapi could practically hear Jin's pout as he said his goodbyes and finally hung up the phone. "Now you."

Yamapi swallowed nervously. "Yes?"

"You're not telling us everything. I think it's got to do with Jin living in Kame's pocket, so spill," Ryo said, and Yamapi sighed.

"How do you know everything?"

"It's a gift."

Yamapi laughed softly, before sighing a little. "I don't know him all that well. I don't-- how do I act around him? I've never really spoken much to him, and if I have, it's always through Jin."

Ryo was quiet. "So you're not sure who the real Kamenashi Kazuya is?" he asked eventually, voice soft.

"See, this is why you're my friend," Yamapi sighed. Ryo always read between the lines, even when Yamapi wasn't entirely sure what the real problem was himself.

"You'll be fine," Ryo said eventually. "You always are. Talk to him like you talk to us and you'll be okay." Yamapi nodded. "Stop worrying. I know you. You're all talkative on TV but when you have to make friends, you clam up."

"...Maybe."

Ryo sighed. "Seriously, Pi. He's a good guy. A little awkward, but good. Just give him a chance, okay?"

 

>>><<<

 

_Just start with 'hi'_

_Ryo shut up_

_You're welcome_

Yamapi slid his phone back into his pocket, watching Kame from the other side of the room. He looked different from the last time Yamapi had seen him. He was still awkwardly skinny, but there was this self-confidence about him that Yamapi hadn't seen before.

Kame was the first to greet him. "Yamapi!" he said happily, rushing over with this great big grin on his face. Yamapi was a little stunned, watching him with wide eyes until Kame cocked his head to the side in confusion. "Are you alright?"

"Y-Yeah," Yamapi answered, nodding. "Sorry."

"I'm so excited we'll be working together," Kame said, beaming. "It's going to be awesome!"

"Yeah."

Kame... wasn't all that bad. He was rather cute, Yamapi had to admit. His eyes shone with this ever-burning curiousness that made Yamapi smile, and he was forever tugging on Yamapi's arm, trying to get him to look at something. Normally that was something like a ladybird flying past or a cloud in the shape of a donkey - one time it was a splinter in his finger. Today, Kame was sitting by a window, staring out of it a little blankly.

"What's up?" Yamapi asked, sitting down next to him with a store-bought bento. "You look down."

Kame hummed. "The sky looks sad today."

" _You_ look sad today."

"Little bit," Kame answered softly, and Yamapi tilted his head. He hadn't really seen Kame upset before. It didn't look nice on him. Yamapi thought that maybe he should help to get rid of it, then.

"How come?" Yamapi asked, scooting closer.

Kame wrenched his eyes from the sky to stare at Yamapi. "Cause you don't like me."

Yamapi stilled. "What? Who told you that?"

Kame pulled his knee up to his chest, resting his cheek against it. "Jin."

Yamapi was going to _murder_ that Akanishi. "Wh-- I don't-- No, that came out wr--"

"It's okay," Kame said. "You don't have to like me. Not everyone likes each other."

"I like you," Yamapi said firmly. "I do."

"But Jin--"

"Jin is Jin," Yamapi sighed. "He probably took something I said the wrong way."

"Something you said?" Kame asked, looking up at him, those big brown eyes shining. Yamapi coughed.

"I was... well. I was kind of nervous about doing this drama... with you," Yamapi said slowly, picking at his bento with the end of his chopsticks. He didn't want to see Kame's face fall.

"Oh."

"What did Jin say about it?" Yamapi asked, curious.

Kame shook his head. "Not much. Something about you complaining to him and Ryo about me."

"Stupid, _stupid_ \--" Yamapi took a deep breath. "Look, Jin wasn't there for the whole conversation, okay? I just... I'm weird with people. So I freak out a little before I meet them, and..." Kame was watching him with an amused expression on his face. It was kind of cute. "What?"

"You just knocked your food onto the floor," Kame said, and Yamapi jumped, noticing for the first time that his food was no longer on his lap, but instead spread out on the ground.

"Aw, man!"

He had been so involved with trying to explain himself to Kame that he hadn't even noticed it slipping off his lap and to the floor. Kame laughed loudly. "Here, I'll help you."

 

>>><<<

 

_AKANISHI I AM GOING TO KILL YOU_

_why?? what did i do??_

_YOU'RE SO STUPID_

_thank you!_

_NOT A COMPLIMENT_

_:(((((((((((((((_

 

>>><<<

 

It takes him a month to realise something's wrong.

Yamapi's sitting in his normal clothes, waiting for the crew to be ready. He's got his bento in his lap again - his sister had made it for him, this time - and he's sitting on the floor, picking at the shiitake mushrooms with his chopsticks. Kame sits down next to him and gives him a big smile, drawing his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them, content on watching the crew rush about.

"Want some?" Yamapi asks, but Kame shakes his head.

"I'm okay," he answers, smiling.

"You sure?" Yamapi says, eyebrows furrowing a little. "We've been here for hours. Have you eaten at all?"

"Yes."

Yamapi pauses at the cold tone threatening to take over Kame's voice. "...Okay." He lets it drop.

But it keeps happening, more and more and more until Yamapi's worrying ends up with a phone call to Jin.

"What?" Jin asks.

"Don't talk with your mouth full," Yamapi says automatically.

"Shut up, you aren't my mother," Jin snaps back, and takes an extra-big bite of whatever he was eating just to annoy Yamapi. Yamapi clicks his tongue. "What're you ringing for, anyway?"

"Oh, it's about Kame."

"It's always about Kame these days," Jin says without any kind of malice at all. "You two best friends or something?"

Yamapi laughs. "Now you know how I feel when I talk to you."

"Shhhh-- ew, now there's cookie on my phone." Yamapi rolls his eyes as static fills his ears - he can only assume that Jin is wiping the phone until it's cookie-free. "Okay, I'm back. What were we talking about?"

"Does Kame normally skip lunch or something?" Yamapi asks, looking up to his ceiling and once again wondering how that mark got up there.

Jin goes quiet. "He's been skipping lunch?" he asks after a while.

"Yeah."

"Shit."

"You okay?"

"I'm fine. You have to make sure he eats, okay?" Jin says, his voice serious. Yamapi nods.

"What's going on?" he asks, a little confused.

"Kame does this thing," Jin explains. He's stopped eating now, and it sounds like he's pacing around his room. "When he's stressed, he doesn't eat. He says he doesn't have an appetite or something. You've gotta make sure he eats, Pi."

"...Sure thing."

 

>>><<<

 

So the next time they're working together, Yamapi watches Kame like a hawk. He looks a little tired - he yawns almost constantly - and he looks entirely too weak. Yamapi's sitting with his lunch right in front of him, and frowns when Kame shakes his head when he asks if he wants some.

"I'll have something later."

"Hey, Kame?" Yamapi asks, and Kame cocks his head.

"Yeah?"

"Wanna come over to my place tonight for dinner?" Yamapi watches Kame's face carefully, watching as Kame's eyebrows furrow for the briefest second before his face lights up.

"Yeah, sure!"

That evening was spent with Yamapi rushing about the place, making sure everything was right. Jin had told him about Kame's favourite dishes ("No tomatoes!"), and he had asked his mother to cook it for their dinner. He's bouncing on the balls of his feet when Kame rings the doorbell, and he rushes to it, wrenching the door open with a rather nervous smile.

"Hi!"

"Hi," Kame says. He looks nice. His shirt is a pretty shade of blue - button-down - and he's wearing these jeans that fit him just right. He's still too thin though, Yamapi thinks as he takes Kame's heavy down coat from him and dumps it onto the back of the couch. "Your house is nice," Kame says, looking around.

"It's not much," Yamapi answers quickly, but he's rather proud. His mother had worked hard after his father had left them so they could always have the best. The house is beautiful, Yamapi has to admit. Everything inside is a testament to how hard she worked - at one point she had been juggling three jobs at once.

"It's pretty, though."

Yamapi just smiles.

"What's that smell?" Kame asks, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. It's funny, Yamapi thinks, but he can't take his eyes off Kame's face.

Why can't he take his eyes off Kame's face?

Kame's eyes are pretty, Yamapi thinks, once Kame re-opens his eyes again and looks at him. "You okay?" Kame asks, this funny little half-smile on his face. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Yeah, I'm good," is all Yamapi says, shaking his head till his hair flops into his eyes. This way, he can pretend like he wasn't just thinking about how it would have been all too easy to lean over and kiss Kame.

Jin was going to kill him.

"So, what's for dinner?" Kame asks, shrugging his shoulders a little and peering into the kitchen.

"Ah!" Yamapi had almost forgotten. "Curry!"

Jin had told him that Kame's favourite food was squid, but Yamapi's mother refused to buy it, and Yamapi didn't like it, anyway. So curry it was.

"Tomo, you've gotta set the table--" Rina appears around the corner, stopping dead in her tracks and staring at Kame with wide eyes.

"Hello," Kame says, and Rina gives him a quick smile.

"Hi. You're not as tall as I thought you'd be," she says, and Yamapi hits her in the shoulder. "Ouch! Stop abusing me!"

Kame laughs when Yamapi tucks her head under his arm. Rina shrieks and flails her arms a little, hitting every piece of Yamapi she can find. He lets her go when she gets awfully close to a delicate part of his anatomy and she punches him in the stomach before rushing away to tell their mother. Yamapi pants and fixes his hair, giving Kame a look.

"I swear, we're normal."

Kame laughs again, and Yamapi leads him into the kitchen. "Kame's here--"

But then his mother is in the doorway, face flushed and hurriedly untying her apron from around her waist. "Hello!" she says, her round face smiling widely. Her hair is in a rare state of disarray and falls in her eyes - eyes that are so similar to Yamapi's own.

"Hello," Kame says politely, bowing. Yamapi's mother just waves a hand.

"I will not tolerate any politeness under my roof," she says, twirling back around to check on the curry. Kame watches her with an amused expression on his face. "Can't be bothered to reciprocate it."

"Lazy!" Rina yells from another room.

"Go set the table you two," Yamapi's mother says, pointing her wooden spoon over to where she had set everything up on the kitchen bench. Yamapi and Kame grab as much as they can and head to the large table, setting the things upon it rather messily.

Dinner is ready soon after. Yamapi's mother places their plates down with a flourish and sits at her place at the head of the table, gesturing for the others to do the same. Kame slides into the seat next to Yamapi, sending Rina a smile from over the top of the centrepiece. The curry is hot and steaming and smells delicious; his mother has never made it like this before.

"You're being fancy cause we have a guest, aren't you?" Yamapi asks, and his mother just winks.

Yamapi throws an inconspicuous look over to Kame, who is watching the steam rise from his rice. "It looks really nice," he says, picking his spoon up and smiling brilliantly. Yamapi coughs.

Yamapi eats a lot. He eats his entire plate and goes back for seconds, even though his mother tells him not to. He notices Kame's plate; notices how Kame's eaten half. That's okay, Yamapi thinks, and excuses himself to the bathroom. He messages Jin.

_he's eating things_

_what kind of things_

_oh you know... grasshoppers and some window cleaner_

_..._

_FOOD. WE GAVE HIM FOOD. AND HE ATE IT._

_:D!_

Kame and Yamapi manage to get out of cleaning up and rush upstairs, collapsing onto Yamapi's bed with breathy laughs. They can still hear Rina's complaints from downstairs.

"Video games?"

"Of course!"

And so they sat next to each other, their knees touching as they battled each other in tiny little cars on-screen. "No!" Yamapi shrieked, "You're on my side--"

"I know!"

"Well, go away--"

Kame pushes him in the shoulder and Yamapi topples to the side. "No-- You'll make me lose--"

"That's the idea."

"You act so sweet and innocent..." Yamapi says, and sits back up, blowing the hair out of his eyes and focusing back on the game. "Now I'm stuck in a field of cows."

Kame cackles. "That's where you should be, loser," he laughs, as his little red car zooms over the finish line. Yamapi shuts the television off.

"That's enough for now," he declares, and Kame hits him in the shoulder.

"Sore loser?"

Yamapi chooses not to answer. Instead, he sets the controller down and slides back so his back hits the foot of his bed, and pins Kame with a stare. "Now, you."

"Yes?" Kame asks, a little nervously.

"Why aren't you eating?" Yamapi asks bluntly.

Kame's face falls and he looks down at the controller still in his hands, his fingers fidgeting with the buttons. Yamapi watches as his index finger traces around the blue button over and over again until he pauses. "Just stressed," Kame says shortly.

"You still have to eat," Yamapi says.

"What do you kno-- Did Jin say something?" Kame asks, his face red with rage.

"He's worried about you, that's all--" Yamapi tries, but Kame's shaking his head and standing up.

"No, he's done this before-- He _knows_ I get stressed easily, why does he--"

"Because he's your best friend!" Yamapi yells, and Kame stops in his tracks. "He's your best friend," Yamapi repeats softly. "You know him. You know he wouldn't do anything to hurt you."

Kame is quiet. Yamapi thinks that maybe he's getting through to him-- but then Kame's hands clench into fists and he's turning around, eyes blazing. "I don't need you to tell me what to do!" he shouts. "I'm fine; I am perfectly fine. I just don't feel hungry, okay? And anyway, I never have the time; I'm whisked away from one place to another and when am I meant to get something to eat? Jin doesn't get it--"

Maybe it's the wrinkles in his forehead; maybe it's the way he's furiously blinking back tears, Yamapi doesn't know. Maybe it's because he's opening up to him. But he's standing up and walking towards him, reaching a hand out to take hold of Kame's thin wrist.

And then he's kissing him, pressing his lips to Kame's ever so lightly. Kame shivers against him and he pulls back, a little surprised at himself. "I'm-- I'm sorry, I don't know what--" But Kame's smiling mysteriously and leaning in to kiss him again, dropping the controller that's still in his hand in favour of clutching onto Yamapi's shirt.

"What're you doing?" Yamapi asks, breaking away from the kiss and stumbling back a little. He forgets to let go though, and so Kame follows.

"Kissing you," Kame says matter-of-factly.

"Well yes-- Why?" Yamapi's heart is thudding in his chest; he searches Kame's face for something. Something. He's not entirely sure what it is, but he feels like he'll know when he sees it.

Kame shrugs. "You did it first."

"I did?"

"I was angry," Kame says, shaking his head in what Yamapi only assumes is frustration. "I was angry, and then you kissed me, and I'm... I'm not angry anymore." He lifts his head to look into Yamapi's eyes, all sorts of emotions swimming within his eyes. "I wonder why."

"M-Maybe we should kiss again," Yamapi suggests, and Kame laughs. "Just so you don't get angry again," Yamapi quickly adds, and Kame just rolls his eyes.

"Shut up."

When Yamapi sees Kame off that night, he ends up pinning Kame to his front door, his hands on Kame's waist and Kame's arms around his neck.

None of this is planned. None of this is expected.

But it's so wonderful that Yamapi can't stop.

 

>>><<<

 

Yamapi doesn't really know how to act around Kame the next time they meet. Kame just grins at him when he passes, and there's this little fluttering in Yamapi's belly that brings this ridiculous smile onto his face.

Kame squeezes his hand once just before a scene and it gives him the strength to finish the whole thing without a mistake.

But it's lunchtime that really surprises him.

Kame slides into the seat next to him with a funny look on his face, and Yamapi stares.

"You're up to something," he says, his mouth full with salad. It wasn't his first choice, but all the pizza had already gone. Stupid fat cameramen. "Did you want some?" he asks, holding up a forkfull of lettuce.

Kame shakes his head, and Yamapi's eyes darken. "Calm down," he laughs softly, and holds up a sandwich. "I... I have my own."

Yamapi can't help but to take hold of Kame's face and kiss him right then and there. He kisses him and kisses him and kisses him until Kame's laughing against his lips and pushing him gently away. He whispers something about feeling embarrassed, and another something about squashing his lunch, but Yamapi doesn't care.

He kisses him again.

 

\--the end

 


End file.
